I remember the first time I saw the solar eclipse, because it was the first time I ever saw a solar eclipse (or any eclipse) with my naked eyes.

I’ve heard about eclipses ever since the time I started understanding language. Each mythology has its own version of the story behind the eclipse. But, all of the humankind agrees on these facets – that the eclipse is unnatural, it endangers their Gods, it is associated with evil, and it is something humankind will not ever be able to control. Hence, before and during the eclipse, any sentient being does not go with its homing instinct (come on, it is dark, so it’s time to go home?) and instead fervently prays, performs rituals, gives sacrifices, and does anything in its power to help the Gods win over the evil.

Now we know that an eclipse is quite a natural phenomenon, yet, it doesn’t feel right when you witness it. During a total solar eclipse, the entire sky goes dark and a sudden lack of heat is immediately felt. You know for sure that it will last only for a few minutes, but you get the sensory overload anyway. And then there are those folks who stare into the ring of the eclipse thinking that it’s safe.

Never mind the drivel. So, it was the first time Chennai was going to witness a total Solar Eclipse after a very long time. And, I was actually in a position to view it in totality (I wasn’t home that day, I was working). When the time was right, I went out, and I witnessed it. The air around went unreal, as if the surrounding air didn’t know whether to make me feel cold or warm. The sky was semi-dark, and all the crows had already hid in their nests. One solitary guard was manning his post, and I trained my eyes on the Sun, or what was left of the Sun.

The Sun was half engulfed by darkness, by Moon. I knew that even with the Moon fully swallowing the Sun, the Sun’s strong rays were still protruding from the ring and can seriously and quickly damage my vision. I felt my head feel light, I felt dizzy; it did feel quite unreal. My mind said that the Sun is not shining so I can stare back at it, but my eyes were pleading to shut close because it was too much for them. My legs began to give away, and the surrounding air didn’t do me any good. My sense of balance began to waver, as all my sensory organs (eyes, ears, what not) began to give conflicting signals to my brain. I bowed my head, and went inside. Later, I realized that I didn’t witness the beginning of the eclipse, but the end of it. I had already missed the total Solar Eclipse.

That didn’t go down with me very well. I was to blame; I went out 5 minutes late. I reassured myself that I can still witness the total Solar Eclipse in Delhi on 21-June. Little did I know back then that the world will be fighting a pandemic and that I’d be stuck in my own room writing this piece.